I discovered that there was still more to her ability for cruelty. She knew me, and she knew the things that bothered me and she intentionally used those things against me through a public forum. In that forum she says that she directs vitriol and sarcasm only at herself. The proof is clearly in the writing, and her words speak a complete lie as her vitriol was so clearly directed at me and she knows she has readers who know me and knew exactly who she was talking about.

I felt the caustic sting of her words in a place where she claimed she would not hurt others. Yet she would claim she cared about me? I once thought that maybe she was done intentionally hurting me, but I was wrong. She had her means and methods to continue to dig in and cut into my heart.

Getting past what she had done to me was no easy task in light of other trials I faced. So if I say that I am not past it, I am probably not lying to myself or anyone else. I did send her a note to let her know she is forgiven. I do mean that. I asked her in that note not to respond. So far she has not. I once asked her not to read this blog. I have not seen evidence that she reads it, though I suspect she would find a way to learn what is written here through other means.